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How to get divorced without hating your ex or tearing your family apart

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https://www.washingtonpost.com/lifestyle/2019/01/14/how-get-divorced-without-hating-your-ex-or-tearing-your-family-apart/?utm_term=.df84adaf8bd5

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Wendy Paris and her ex-husband, David, have been divorced for seven years. In that time, they’ve both moved from New York to Los Angeles, and have never lived more than three blocks from each other. They still host parties together. For years they walked their son, Alexander, now 11, to elementary school together every morning. David still comes over several times a week to make breakfast, and the three of them generally spend Sundays together.

My ex and I try to do family stuff together (birthdays, holidays, and dinners out every couple weeks), but she's just not comfortable just "hanging out". I'd love to reach the point that she came over for dinner or just hung out on a weekend afternoon. 

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Unless the split is completely mutual, if one person is still interested in the other, I wonder how such arrangements would survive one of them having a new partner. At one year of separation, I do a lot with my ex-wife and the kids, but I have to admit that some of that is attraction to my ex-wife. I'm not sure I'd be nearly as interested in doing stuff with my kids, ex-wife, and a new husband. 

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