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newme

when to tell the kids

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Well, it's done. I told him I'm out. But we still live together and haven't told the kids yet. Should I tell them before they figure anything out on their own? I'm not sure how well we can pretend and fool them.

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On 1/7/2019 at 8:55 PM, newme said:

Well, it's done. I told him I'm out. But we still live together and haven't told the kids yet. Should I tell them before they figure anything out on their own? I'm not sure how well we can pretend and fool them.

No sooner than a few weeks before someone is ready to move out

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I think the idea with trying to time it is that you want to give the kids a little time to adjust and talk to both, but not so much time as to confuse them about whether you're staying together, but also time it so you have as much information as possible about what the plan will be (who's moving, when, where, etc...).

But, of course, there are many good reasons not to hit that perfect ideal.

Edited by jimdahl

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Depending how old your kids are, they'll notice something's different. The sooner the better, but have a plan what you're going to say.

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I couldn't stay a day with my ex! When I caught him in the affair I threw him out that night. The kids didn't think it was weird that he wasn't around because he never is and the very first day I talked to a lawyer and then told them he wasn't coming back.

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